Falling In and Falling Out.

Empty Memory of when it first Occured.
I'm still, Frozen, Reaching and Using up all I have..
just to be able to breathe you again.

I remember you Boy, but I don't remember the feeling anymore.
Be my backbone, bring me back home.
It's been too long, I'm barely holding on.
Amaze me, Make me..I need you to Be..
the only person I'd choose to be waking up wanting.

Days and Days, Memories stay.
Suddenly, you become part of the past.
Hoping this Giving Up does not last.
"I LOVE YOU, just because..don't ask why"
Yet still Frozen, Reaching and Using up all I have.

Believe. Lie. Trust. Question.
Heart. Mind. Soul.
Ability to pace. Distaste. Disillusioned.

Hold me. Mold me.
Clip my wings from reaching High.
Tie me. Ignite me.
Pull my Being to your kind.

Frozen, Reaching..and Using up all I have.
Just to slowly, hopefully,
Fall in Love with you,
all over again.

NOTHING.

"i don't wanna be your friend.
i just wanna be your lover.
no matter how it ends.
no matter how it starts."
-house of cards,radiohead.

could it have first started when i laid eyes on you. could i have known what you would eventually do to me. would it have been the same were it someone else. could you have been a message, or could you have been an answer.

2:02am. 06.14.09
hug me,mister. three still-shots of your lips against mine. you did the 100. back it up, back it up--i say. but we turned the moment into a heart-throbbing souvenir. you're my best kiss, to date. you said that maybe our lips just dance so well..and yes, they unspeakable do. i have not enjoyed lip-locking this much, until you. i daydreamed this moment. my innervoice warned me about how good it could be, and i was not lied to.

we let the passion take it's course. you hold my right one, touch it the best way you know. and it was amazing. you say "what, i'm smooth?" i say i'd word it differently.."you know how to touch a woman." let's skip the rest. i was vulnerable in your arms. i touched you, you did the same. "you're so wet." "what do you expect, i say, "i'm coming". and i did.

4:30+am 06.14.09 to 06:30am 06.14.09---beach. beach. beach. STOP apologizing. two to tango, two to tango. i say, be mine until we both sleep it off. day by day, day by day--you say. by that lifeguard house we sat, sun out, making out. you kiss my neck to nape. sweet, knowingly, surrendering. i find no other words to interpret the moment, the feeling. it is what it is. tomorrow, a new day. tomorrow, it will make more sense. tomorrow, FUCK. the epitome of this bliss always comes with the sensation of pain and hurt. God, help and heal me. please.

allthingsordinary.net (copyright!)

I think that we should run as fast as we can into what we don't know
Don't let yourself become of victim of actualizing your worst fears.
Accept the sadness of human existence and let go because you want to have fun. Truly understand and accept.
Know yourself.
Have confidence in what you are.
Fight for what you want.
Smash shit.
Throw glasses off the table.

RUN.